As I started my new job I had no idea the passion that would blossom in me from it. My experience is a perfect example of why we should try new things in life, how it’s ok to change our paths as life goes on, what you assume something will be like may not always be the case and who you can evolve into by the mindset you create. Don’t get me wrong, I have many mundane days but when I have the opportunity to make a difference it is worth all the awkward moments of being the creepy lady sitting in the corner of the classroom.
I quickly learned my niche in this new role at the school. Even though I was hired to support the kids with their academics I realized through getting to know them that what they actually struggled with the most was social/emotional distractions that led to anxiety and difficulty with being able to focus. So, I became the go-to person for my students to air their stress to someone who did not get caught up in the drama of it but listened with the purpose of providing insight to help them deal with it more efficiently and effectively. I gave them perspective and tools to process, taught them about mindset and the importance of self-talk. I saw that once they were able to address their issues, they could then relax and concentrate on the subject matter in the classroom. The feeling of seeing their burdens no matter how insignificant most adults would view them or many times actually quite significant no matter who you are, being lifted off their shoulders and the smile returning to their faces was priceless to me.
I have always put more value on how people feel over what they achieve especially with raising my boys but was often told this was because I didn’t have to live in “the real world” but now I see that it directly impacts the ability to achieve. Too many parents of these middle schoolers are already putting so much pressure on the kids to get straight A’s so they can get into college that they feel valued by their grades rather than who they are and end up missing the joy in the actual learning process. I teach them that middle school is where they learn how to learn and once they figure out what works best for them the grades will fall into place more naturally. This is an age that lends itself to being unsure and self-conscious so the last thing they need is added pressure.
Since emotional intelligence accounts for 80% of success, wouldn’t it make sense to not only teach it but encourage the practice of it to students especially at such an impressionable age. Imagine how much easier the teen years (ok, maybe not easier given that the hormones are still raging) but at least more manageable if they had the knowledge to be more self-aware and therefore better able to conduct themselves in relationships? I am now on a mission to make EQ just as important as IQ for kids. Why wait until they are adults to try to implement it’s benefits?
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