Now that my mind was made up, I was on a mission to make the move as soon as possible. I worked like mad to get the house ready for sale. After several road blocks by the ex, a sale agreement was made and I was off to the races packing. I could spend this whole post lamenting on all the struggles he gave me through this process but the days of giving him my energy are over and I am just focusing on the pride I have in finding a way to prevail in spite of his efforts. My therapist was a bit worried about me because I was putting so much stock in “Once I move to California, …. will be different” because I was nowhere near the positivity I was telling her I would have. While I was still there living it, I gave myself grace to experience all the emotions and frustrations that I was facing in the process of moving and surviving a 7 day divorce trial that spanned over more than 2 months. I am forever grateful to my friends and family who stuck it out with me because I know I exuded a ton of negativity during that time but I needed to process all of it so I would be ready to let it go and move on when I actually moved on.
I vowed to myself that once in California, I would take on the mindset to live in the moment and drop expectations, living with the attitude of appreciation within my personal boundaries. I would be open to new experiences and people but have a clearer vision and tolerance of what I would allow in my life. I had an amazing mover who took care of driving all my belongings including my dog out there for me, I gave my car to my middle son who had his taken away from him and boarded a plane with a suitcase in hand. I landed late at night so headed to a hotel near the airport for the night before I could get into my apartment. I happen to be on a shuttle bus with Southwest employees who when they heard the story of my new journey that was starting at that very moment, they applauded, cheered and congratulated me and I couldn’t think of a better way to solidify my new attitude in life!!
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